2007/02/17

Do You Suffer From DSACDAD?

DSACDAD or "Dysphoric Social Attention Consumption Deficit Anxiety Disorder" is a newly discovered disease that is quite common in modern consumer cultures. To find out if you suffer from DSACDAD, take the quiz here: HAVIDOL QUIZ

Happily, help has arrived in the form of a new pharmaceutical, HAVIDOL (avafyntyme HCL) from Future PHARMS Inc.


SELF-DISCOVERY THROUGH HAVIDOL

HAVIDOL helps sufferers see that no matter how much they have, more is always possible.

Patients have reported feeling:

* renewed interest in themselves
* increased ability to spend
* higher risk tolerance
* better quality consumer decisions
* improved social attention-getting skills
* return to former self esteem levels
* supplementary stamina levels
* augmented vision
* a surge in well-being

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Click here for Reuters news coverage about Havidol: REUTERS

15 comments:

The Moody Minstrel said...

What if you already have everything?

bonnie said...

My score was 24! I'm not normal!

YAY!

...O
:D/>
.O

QUASAR9 said...

So "Have It All"
higher risk tolerance
is that like alcohol
or speed, and cocaine too

Can you get me some please
I'd like to know what I'm missing and maybe buy more of what I don't need.
PS - I saw the list of things it does, but only caught the blurry list of the side effects, as they raced thru the list, still managing to pronounce every syllable

PPS - Dee SACk DAD
Is that something to do with children getting mum to divorce dad if he forgets to get them a present or refuses to up their "pocket money"???

Pandabonium said...

Moody - unless you are buying this medication, you don't have it all.

Bonnie - "I'm not normal!"I could have told you that. ;^) (you're exceptional).

Quarsar9 - check out the linked website for a written list of possible side effects. I liked this one: "inter-species communication".

I don't know if they have them in the UK, but in the US, "big pharma" does ads like this on TV and radio with similar style websites to push their pills. At the same time, the government public service announcements say "just say 'no' to drugs". huh?

Hypatia said...

This is hilarious! I love it!

A disease which I saw in epidemic proportions at the private school I worked at.....

I think if you said the words "voluntary simplicity" to these folks, their heads asplode!

Don Snabulus said...

I Hadibol reading this.

k said...

My score was 25.
Am I a liar??

Pandabonium said...

Hypatia & Don - glad you enjoyed it. I know lots of people who would take something like this if it were real.

K - you know, one of the problems with treating this disease is dealing with denial. If your score was that low, perhaps you are not getting in touch with your true feelings and should consult your health professional for help.

Martin J Frid said...

Hahaha, the side-effects they list on the website are all rather severe. I particularly noticed "Inter-species communication" was listed... Indeed a major concern! Where do I sign up for the IPO?

Que: Listen to "White Rabbit" by Jefferson Airplane

The Moody Minstrel said...

Sorry...I forgot to take the quiz. I have since rectified this oversight. My score was 32.

YD said...

omigod i got 30, on the brink of needing help, just like every single person who took the test! oh nooooo...

I'm indeed IMPRESSED by how far they would go, suddenly everyone has got some depressing diseases...

Pandabonium said...

Martin - I liked that one too. If I could talk to the animals...

Moody - on the edge.

YD - also on the edge. Yes, pharma companies have literally invented diseases in order to sell the cure and it seems in some social circles popping pills of some sort is considered normal.

Almost half of adult Americans take at least one prescription drug. The National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey found a 13 percent increase between 1988-1994 and 1999-2000 in the proportion of Americans taking at least one drug and a 40 percent jump in the proportion taking three or more medicines.

Medicines have their place, but I think overuse has become commercial and cultural aberration.

The Moody Minstrel said...

BTW, Panda, this ad has been in the news lately because apparently a lot of people are believing it and asking their doctors if they can get a prescription for it!

Swinebread said...

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Pandabonium said...

Moody -amazing. Well, maybe not so surprising. This art project did an excellent job of imitating actual drug ad campaigns who spend millions finding ways of getting people to buy their pills.